Hi Reader,

DISCLAIMER: You may be thinking, “Rachel is so mean to write about someone she thinks is annoying” or “Rachel is annoying too, so who is she to complain?” And while all of this may be true, I have just spotted A Most Annoying Girl (because there are others.) Seriously. The level in which she annoys me truly exceeds anyone else I have never met.

Anyhow, there is this girl in one of my 200+ people lectures that asks questions every time my professor pauses to take a breath. It seems as though she has just a bottomless sack of stupid questions to whip out at any given moment. Today, I made the mistake of sitting in front of her. Here are my complaints:

-She breathes like a hairdryer. I could feel / hear her breath hit the back of my head. STRIKE ONE.

-As mentioned before, she is like the Santa Clause of obtuse questions, and it seems that every class period is Christmas. What is most frustrating, is that she relentlessly asks these types of questions multiple times EVERYDAY. STRIKE TWO.

-She laughs and talks to her self so loudly that I believe her only intent is to catch our professor’s attention. And if this were the case, JUST SIT IN THE FRONT ROW AND EXCHANGE NUMBERS WITH OUR PROFESSOR. THEN STOP COMING TO CLASS. STRIKE THREE.

Just to cut this short, because even though there is a zero-percent chance that she reads (or will ever read) my blog, I will just spare everyone from any further wrath…

Oh wait. There’s more. On a similar yet separate note, my internet is so slow, that I could likely walk a letter to your house faster than my internet could send an email– which is why I have not (and will not) proof-read this blog. IOWA.

I am just a bundle of roses today! I hope this does not too severely stain your imagine of me, Reader.

LOVE,

Rachel

P.S. My last chance to drink illegally is tomorrow.