This is a Q&A session where naive Pre-Minnesota Rachel asks experienced Current Rachel questions about things Current Rachel has learned from her life in Minnesota thus far.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “Gosh, I wish I could find more hunting equipment than I could ever imagine. Is there such a place?”
A: Yes. However, while Gander Mountain is the Walmart of hunting goods, Fleet Farm is the Costco of manliness. I would know because I have become so rugged.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “I have met many people who are getting married. Why are you not yet engaged?”
A: Well, Pre-Minnesota Rachel, apparently marriage-ability and your ability to cook are directly correlated. Can you cook? Exactly. That is probably why.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “What is a ‘Dauber?’”
A: A Dauber is a massive marker-like utensil for dotting numbers at a Bingo Hall. Could also be used for writing on large pieces of paper.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “How big is a cow?”
A: Though it varies, cows are approximately the size of a small truck, or a large sedan.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “Does Camo Duct-tape exist?”
A: Yes. It is intensely useful. Naive Pre-Minnesota Rachel, you will win a roll of Camo Duct-Tape from a co-worker in the future.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “I wish the seats of my boat would blend in with the forest. Where can I purchase a camo boat-seat cover?”
A: Too easy. Fleet Farm.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “What is a State Fair?”
A: A state fair is a fair that has a bunch of food and things in it. A bajillion people, including, but not limited to, The Backstreet Boys, attend.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “What is a Comedy Club?”
A: A very politically incorrect place.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “What happens when you get your oil changed?”
A: You bring your car to the Toyota Dealership (or other place that changes oil) and they give you a buzzer that flashes when your car is ready.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: “I’ve been looking for a Palace made out of corn. Does such a thing exist?”
A: Yes. It is located in South Dakota.

Pre-Minnesota Rachel: Wow, I would have never imagined to have learned all of this useful information just by living in Minnesota. Gosh, you are so knowledgeable now.”

Yes. Yes, I know. Someday, Pre-Minnesota Rachel, you will be just as smart as me. No, seriously. You will be.

Anyhow, thanks for getting so far into this blog, Reader. You are such a trooper!

LOVE,

Rachel

P.S. Reader, I have to bring in Breakfast for my dept on Thursday– what should I bring!? Help, please!